my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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