just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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