FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
ok first of all what the fuck
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
