And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
