Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
