people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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