margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
how drunk are you?
Several
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
