yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
