did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
