'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
