actually, I'm a sock model
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
