So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
