I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
