why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
My liver just had a heart attack.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
