Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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