So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I just threw up on my dentist
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
