I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
