Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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