We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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