After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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