when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize