got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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