it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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