Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
