That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
