Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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