Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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