i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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