Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
