16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
