How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
