Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
