I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
