Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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