I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
