I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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