I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
