i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
