bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
