Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Did you just see the Batmobile???
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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