Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Randomize
