Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
