Are we in a gay sports bar?
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize