shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
