wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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