She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
