...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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