he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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