Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
