So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
